While reading Chapter 6, the section about Proximity and Personal Space caught my attention. “Proxemics refers to space and our use of it. Space is primary means through which cultures express values and shape patterns of interaction (pg145).” My family and I are of Latin decent and spending time and sharing space among each other is very important. When we there was a birthday, graduation, some was expecting a child, anything that gave us a reason to be together as one, we took advantage off. Latin families are known for always sharing their space with one another. I remember growing up, I was always around my family, my uncles, aunts, cousins, grandmothers etc. My parents told me family is all you have and we never turn our backs on them. Even when we came to the United States we continue to follow the Latin cultural. We all would get together as much as we can. Our tradition is once you are married and have your own home you allow your parents, and even some relative live with you. For example, my aunt and grandmother live with my parents, my brother and I. Since I have become accustom to the American way of living, I like having my own space, don’t get me wrong I love spending time with the family but I couldn’t see my parents living with my husband and I when that time comes.
“Proxemics offers keen insight into the relative power and status according to various groups in society (pg145)”. Being from a Latin decent, the man always had to sit at the head of the table and he was the first one to get served. When it was dinner time for us, my father always sat at the head of the table, and his food was served before anyone else’s. My dad also had a spot on the couch. I remember the first time I sat on the couch, in his spot, he came towards me, with a mean face and in Spanish told me that was his spot and I need it to move and of course I listened (I had to). From then on whenever I sat in his spot and he was ready to sit there I wouldn’t wait for him to walk over to me I just knew that I had to move. It’s kind of funny, because when my relatives come over they all know not to sit in his spot.
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
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6 comments:
Hi,
Good blog I definitely understand what you are saying. I come from a typical close knit Italian family. My extended family is like my immediate family. We are always together from the the time I was little until now. We get together for everything. I have some friends who say they would never be able to tolerate it if they had to see their family for every little thing the way I do. When getting together for dinners in my family all the men sit on one end of the table and the women on the other. We also knew that we always had to serve them their food first before we would serve ourselves. I guess their are just some traditions that can never really be broken.
Hi!
Great blog! I find it interesting that even today, your family takes other family members into their home, whether it be an immediate family member or an aunt or uncle. In this day and age I find that to be quite admirable. Lots of people are left to live on their own until they are no longer able to function on their own. I also like that your family is so close knit. That's great because you know you can always depend on them when you need them.
Thank you ladies. Yes my parents and family have always been very supportive and only wish the best for me and my brother. I'm 24 years old and planning to move out, but my parents are so bonded to me that they don't agree with me leaving. If they had it their way I would stay with them forever even after I was married and had my own family. My family is great, but I could not see myself living with them forever.
I thought it was interesting how you tied your culture into proxemics...how about more specific examples of gender? How does your mother illustrate proxemics? And, what gender patterns did you learn in your family from your culture that are specific to gender?
Another example I can give you is about me. I love having my own room, my own space. My room is the place where I can go and gather my thoughts. Everyone in the house knows that and if they bother me I can get very moody. My mother doesn’t illustrate Proxemics too often. She very family oriented so she always around us, but when she has her time to herself she goes shopping on her own or does some yard work. I learned from my family that a woman is always attending to a man and when we have a family we must become very family oriented, leaving little time for ourselves and not having so much of our own space.
Response to Tricia's Blog:
Great post Tricia. I agree that women can do just as much as men can. I also agree with you about military women, they should be allowed to fight for our country if they want, but not go into combat zone. I think we worry more about one group more then the other because that’s a female trait. Although we say women should do almost everything men do, we still know that women are to be handled with care. I’m not saying we are soft, but women have more to lose. Also, congrats on going to school to become a police officer. I know being a police officer and being a military woman have their differences, but in both positions you are facing being shot at and even killed, does that scare you at all?
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